Thursday, May 5, 2011

A Little Trick

So you all know I used to work as a nurse.  For many reasons this can be a crazy-making occupation, not least the fact that if you screw up someone can die.  However, I worked in a really good office with good doctors who had adequate people skills (for the most part).  And I was good enough at my job that when I quit to have a baby they all wheedled me to stay.

Despite that, I used to periodically get into little whirlpools of worry.  What if Dr. Soandso came up to me the next day and took issue with the way I charted things, something I had organized the day before, or something I had done with a patient?  What if...

It got to be quite a hassle.  And then I realized that there was no foundation for the worry.  And that's when the whole key to dealing with the thought pattern burst over me: if nothing has actually changed at work to prompt this feeling, it's not real.  It's an attack, a temptation to the sin of worry or anxiety.

The moment I figured that out and asked the Lord for help, the mood went away, rarely to return.  The devil knows not to press a bad strategy--once you know the truth, you'll never be fooled by a trick again.

Now let's apply that to homemaking.

Today is a pretty normal day.  The kids were sick yesterday and are tearful for small causes today.  I have been down all morning, and have felt like throwing my responsibilities to the wind: cancelling appointments, ignoring housework, and "forgetting" to get dinner going.  In God's grace I remembered my old experience and began to analyze the root of my feeling.

Basically, when I came to analyze it, I was depressed because there are no mountains in my part of Texas.  It would be very strange to have mountains here, geologically, but I miss them.  However, it's silly to be depressed because of the flatness of Texas.  And once I could bring myself to admit that, the depression began to dissipate and I realized I am mostly just tired.

Here's my new revelation:  it can be tempting to stay depressed, upset, or irritated, because feeling that way has its immediate compensations.  It would be kind of nice to wallow in feeling sad that there are no mountains here, but it would also be insulting to the God Who both flattened Texas and decided I should live here.  So I decided to stop feeling depressed--not to squash, repress, and deny the feeling, but simply to decide that the temptation to dwell on the feeling and what was causing it was as wrong for me, in that moment, as the temptation for someone else to dwell on lustful feelings.

I hope maybe this helps someone out, because I think we tend to view our feelings as mostly out of our control, and hence to excuse behavior that is really not excusable.  It's not all right to snap at people because you had a rough day, and it's not all right to allow your mood to get worse without trying to stop it.

All the other things about getting happy apply, of course--eat enough and good food, get enough sleep, get outside, do things you enjoy.  But everyone's going to have bad days.  Don't let them determine your thought life.  Analyze your situation.  Is there really anything warranting the emotions you're having?  Was what that person said really THAT bad?  Is there really any change in your circumstances from, say, Last Wednesday when you were happy to justify the conviction today that You Hate Your Life?

Usually not.  There are some circumstances I can think of where sadness is justified, but I'm not in one of them.  Remember: now you know the truth, and you won't be tricked again.

Cheers,

Breanna

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