So I was kickboxing an evil ninja and...

...I broke my foot.

Actually the kickboxing part is a lie. And the ninja. Actually I was just walking across the church parking lot and twisted my ankle, and broke my fifth metatarsal, but doesn't the ninja story sound more exciting?

I mean, who breaks their foot just walking? It wasn't fancy walking or snowy or muddy or anything. I was wearing heels, but they were low and mom-ish, not stillettos.

Thank the Lord my in-laws were coming up for lunch anyway, and could sit with the kiddos while the Husband whisked me off to urgent care. All the way there I kept denying the obvious:

"Maybe (ouch) it's just (ouch) a sprain?"

We got to urgent care and they took x-rays, and said "yep, it's broke" and also cautioned me against putting ANY weight on my foot. I would need to use crutches. Oh, and they didn't keep crutches there at urgent care. How I was supposed to get to my car was a mystery; perhaps most people have magic carpets when they break their feet.

Anyhoo, I am now established in the Big Chair with my foot in a boot brace, being waited on and having to hop back and forth to the bathroom on crutches that we rented from Shopko. (Yes, we have the money to buy crutches; but my dear sweet mother-in-law broke her ankle not long ago and has crutches that will fit me, and it was only an eighth the cost to rent crutches as buy them.)

On the upside, since I gave birth to Brother earlier (and since such a birth costs around five grand before insurance) I've hit my out-of-pocket max already on the insurance, and presumably everything is free. Which is good since the urgent care people tell me that I have to see an orthopedic guy who will probably want to put pins in my foot. I'll likely get one of them cool cards to take to airports, so they don't assume I'm a shoe bomber. Score!

So next time you see a ninja, punch him real good for me. It must have been invisible ninjas. I can't figure out any other reason for a perfectly healthy person to randomly break their foot in a flat parking lot.

Bleah!

(You'll forgive me if I can't sign off "cheers" as usual.)

Breanna