Are you crafty? Lately been decluttering toys and a bit disgruntled by how many Chic-fil-A prizes were crunched up and shoved between the bed and the nightstand? (No on that last one? Perhaps you just want toys in the house that actually look okay left strewn under and around the coffee table when impromptu people show up in your house?)
Try these for a Noah's Ark or a barnyard or a zoo: http://rhythmofthehome.com/summer-2011/magical-toys-linda-dawkins-natural-suburbia/
Note however that this is far, far from endorsing Waldorf education. The Waldorf/Steiner theory is kooky, to put it kindly. (They make pretty toys and nice art supplies. They also recommend keeping your work area tidy not because it makes it easier to work, is less stressful, or because it shows respect for those around you--but because trash on the floor attracts bad fairies.)
One of the things Waldorf does right for the wrong reasons is emphasize rhythm in the home--i.e., every day has a framework. If you're looking to formalize yours a bit, try Steady Days or the accompanying blog, Steady Mom.
Need a bit of encouragement that this Mommy gig is really worth doing well? Try Sally Clarkson. Especially this article, First Time Obedience, Really? Note--not that this should be a problem for those of you who know my kids aren't brats, but still--that I'm not advocating letting kids ignore us--neither is Clarkson. But this article gave me a bit of grace to keep from feeling defeated that I have to tell Buddy twenty-seven times that scotch tape is not rope and that we don't have any more gummy bears because we ATE THEM ALL. This article reminded me that it's not him and it's not me: it's the fact that he's two, and his little brain hasn't fully set up yet. When his neurons are firing in sync with each other, he'll hear me as well as his older sister does. In the meantime, it's a relief not to wonder if I should spank for something that doesn't seem like a real infraction (because he didn't "listen" the first time I told him there were no gummy bears in the drawer).
So as soon as my self-imposed Amazon no-buying month is done, I'll probably get one of Clarkson's books and let you know what I think.
One of the problems with motherhood is that it's really vital to get it right. Not only do you have eternal souls under your care, but from a purely day-to-day practical standpoint, happy obedient kids are just a lot more fun to hang around with than cranky, mean kids. And some moms, I think, get so frustrated and tired and have so few resources (meaning help or knowledge), that they start laying about themselves with a wooden spoon or they start zoning out in one way or another. It all depends on whether your approach to perfectionism is to get super-controlling or to give up.
Books (and there are lots of them) and blogs (and there are lots of them) that reiterate what moms are doing wrong and why that's bad are not healthy reading for a mom in either extreme. What is better is to recognize that, like you, your kids are sinners. Therefore they can't be left to themselves--they will stay savages if you do that. But, like you, your kids are created in the image of God. Because of that they will occasionally exhibit flashes of the divine--creativity, kindness, and other graces that God has allowed His fallen creation to sometimes retain.
Can I encourage you, if you're feeling overwhelmed and defeated by your kids' behavior, to consider whether something other than your terrible-ness at disciplining them might be at fault? Maybe it's the fact that they get really, really cranky and unreasonable if their blood sugar drops (that would be Miss Boo) or that they get hyper if they miss a nap (Miss Boo again) or that they need to go potty but haven't figured out how to verbalize it (Buddy). Think how you would behave in such a situation--it's mean to punish someone for a physical condition they are unable to change.
Correct the situation. Feed upon the Word of God. And pitch those books that have always felt wrong to you, anyway. (For instance, the sleep book that recommended putting two baby gates on top of each other to keep your kid in their room if they refused to fall asleep on command. Or the book that recommended training a baby to stay on their blanket on the floor by spanking their soft little hand if they tried to roll off. Oh yes, these are real books.)
Now Buddy is awake, so I need to act on my conviction that they get more naughty when Mama's on the computer (ergo, I need to cut the computer time) by turning off my laptop and going to be Mama.
Cheers,
Breanna
Try these for a Noah's Ark or a barnyard or a zoo: http://rhythmofthehome.com/summer-2011/magical-toys-linda-dawkins-natural-suburbia/
Note however that this is far, far from endorsing Waldorf education. The Waldorf/Steiner theory is kooky, to put it kindly. (They make pretty toys and nice art supplies. They also recommend keeping your work area tidy not because it makes it easier to work, is less stressful, or because it shows respect for those around you--but because trash on the floor attracts bad fairies.)
One of the things Waldorf does right for the wrong reasons is emphasize rhythm in the home--i.e., every day has a framework. If you're looking to formalize yours a bit, try Steady Days or the accompanying blog, Steady Mom.
Need a bit of encouragement that this Mommy gig is really worth doing well? Try Sally Clarkson. Especially this article, First Time Obedience, Really? Note--not that this should be a problem for those of you who know my kids aren't brats, but still--that I'm not advocating letting kids ignore us--neither is Clarkson. But this article gave me a bit of grace to keep from feeling defeated that I have to tell Buddy twenty-seven times that scotch tape is not rope and that we don't have any more gummy bears because we ATE THEM ALL. This article reminded me that it's not him and it's not me: it's the fact that he's two, and his little brain hasn't fully set up yet. When his neurons are firing in sync with each other, he'll hear me as well as his older sister does. In the meantime, it's a relief not to wonder if I should spank for something that doesn't seem like a real infraction (because he didn't "listen" the first time I told him there were no gummy bears in the drawer).
So as soon as my self-imposed Amazon no-buying month is done, I'll probably get one of Clarkson's books and let you know what I think.
One of the problems with motherhood is that it's really vital to get it right. Not only do you have eternal souls under your care, but from a purely day-to-day practical standpoint, happy obedient kids are just a lot more fun to hang around with than cranky, mean kids. And some moms, I think, get so frustrated and tired and have so few resources (meaning help or knowledge), that they start laying about themselves with a wooden spoon or they start zoning out in one way or another. It all depends on whether your approach to perfectionism is to get super-controlling or to give up.
Books (and there are lots of them) and blogs (and there are lots of them) that reiterate what moms are doing wrong and why that's bad are not healthy reading for a mom in either extreme. What is better is to recognize that, like you, your kids are sinners. Therefore they can't be left to themselves--they will stay savages if you do that. But, like you, your kids are created in the image of God. Because of that they will occasionally exhibit flashes of the divine--creativity, kindness, and other graces that God has allowed His fallen creation to sometimes retain.
Can I encourage you, if you're feeling overwhelmed and defeated by your kids' behavior, to consider whether something other than your terrible-ness at disciplining them might be at fault? Maybe it's the fact that they get really, really cranky and unreasonable if their blood sugar drops (that would be Miss Boo) or that they get hyper if they miss a nap (Miss Boo again) or that they need to go potty but haven't figured out how to verbalize it (Buddy). Think how you would behave in such a situation--it's mean to punish someone for a physical condition they are unable to change.
Correct the situation. Feed upon the Word of God. And pitch those books that have always felt wrong to you, anyway. (For instance, the sleep book that recommended putting two baby gates on top of each other to keep your kid in their room if they refused to fall asleep on command. Or the book that recommended training a baby to stay on their blanket on the floor by spanking their soft little hand if they tried to roll off. Oh yes, these are real books.)
Now Buddy is awake, so I need to act on my conviction that they get more naughty when Mama's on the computer (ergo, I need to cut the computer time) by turning off my laptop and going to be Mama.
Cheers,
Breanna
No comments:
Post a Comment